I feel like a yogurt that’s been sitting around in the fridge for a while. Each time you open the door to aimlessly look around when you know exactly what lies inside, you see that plastic container on the top shelf. I’ve been living to many predictable days. Every so often, I find I have moments were I’m opened to more things and were I try not to judge myself, those are the days were I try new things and gain great memories. I want to have more of those “fuck it” moments. Moments when you think to yourself “oh why not!” and then you find yourself unarmed and having a good time. I’ve found that the key to having days that include those type of moments, is taking advantage of opportunities that come your way and not expecting a whole lot, just living in the moment. Unfortunately, sometimes, I see the opportunity as it is heading into the sunset without me and so times like those make me feel like I’m on the sidelines watching other people get in on all the action.
Just like that yogurt in the fridge, opportunities have expiration dates, sometimes they’re clearly visible. Other times, you have to really turn it and look around for the scratched up black ink that contains the now blurry numbers. If you don’t take advantage of it in its prime time, you might find that it turns clumpy and maybe a little furry, and what is that color? strawberries are not supposed to be green. If you let the moment pass, it will and you will be disappointed and start asking questions with “what if” in them. It’s like shopping at Marshall’s or some other discount store, were if you fall in love with a pair of patterned pants but go home to think about if you really want them, and then it turns out that you do, so you go back to the store an hour, a day or a week later, and they are no longer there.
I think I need to be more confident in myself. Every year, around this time, I watch commencement speeches. I guess I try to think of myself as part of the audience the speaker is addressing. Some contain the same advice over and over again, but others provide a fresh perspective and motivation. It’s like watching a good movie were the ending just leaves you wanting to do more for yourself. I want to do more for myself and take opportunities before they expire.