Leaving without goodbyes

Saying goodbye to a place is not the same as parting ways with a person. Recently, I’ve noticed how every time i think “I’ll come back one last time before I have to leave” it seems I never actually do. When I connect with a place I’ve gotten to know well, and I’ve created memories there, I feel attached because of those times that have now become part of the past that I enjoy remembering every so often. Sometimes,   I never figure when the actual last time is going to be. So now, I think back to when that last time was without me acknowledging that I wasn’t going back. That moment when you go somewhere, and expect to go back, so you don’t say goodbye, and the next time you remember that place, you realize that you’re gone. And sure, you might eventually go back there, but the feeling, that feeling you had when you were there, it’s just different. It’s different because the moment passed and it will never be the same. To me, saying goodbye to a place, just means taking a moment to take a last look around and taking the time to know how you feel in that moment. The next time, if there is one, will probably not have the same taste in the air. You’ll be in another moment in life. The place will be the same, just like you remember it, but you won’t be the same. Other places might change you, other people will touch you, you evolve, this is not a bad thing yet there’s something that makes me a bit sad, the kind of sad that’s not immediate. I can be out having a beer and a song comes up that reminds me of that place, and then i remember how I never went back before I left it. That kind of sadness. The kind that doesn’t leave a bitter taste in my mouth, the kind that takes me back in time to a specific moment and makes me want to live it again, the kind of sad that strangely enough makes me happy, because at some point in time, without knowing it then, a place changed me for the better.

I feel like saying goodbye to a place is more personal than doing the same with a person. Parting ways with a place is like leaving a part of yourself from that moment and taking a picture of how you were and how you felt there and keeping it in your wallet. Pieces of me are scattered in places that I’ll never forget. In some time I’ll be leaving behind a lot of my favorite places, in order to go meet new ones that will hopefully be unforgettable.

It comforts me to know that I’ll never forget the places, what worries me most is that people might forget me.


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